Jen Grier's Multiblog

Focus

This past week, I was sick with a nasty cold bug of some sort.  The forced down time has got me thinking about my time and how I use it.  There’s a slow revolution of thought… perhaps I am going to fail if I keep on the way I have.

Perhaps I am not focused enough in my scope, you know?  Perhaps I won’t achieve much of anything if I keep trying to do 3 or 4 jobs well simultaneously, or at least in my mind’s eye.  I think the priorities that I actually have need to line up with the ones in my mind.

It seems obvious, I guess.  It’s not when you’re living it.  It’s very easy to miss the mark, mentally, but continue to go on with whatever is best in the moment, over and over again, and not catch the incongruence.

Translation from Jen-ese: I’m realizing that I may have to give up on some goals/roles if I really want to move forward.  I’m just not sure which goals are best to drop, but I have a hunch… a hunch that music creation may be the thing to drop.  Not that I wouldn’t continue pursuits as a hobby, but to be honest with myself that it’s not worth the job frustration to constantly keep it in the mix.

Well, nothing is decided, but my gut is my gut.  We’ll see how this plays out, won’t we?  I’d have no regrets if that came to pass, you know.  I’m much closer to be in a place I am happy with because of my music skills and all of the time I have devoted to them, so there is no retroactive loss.  I see it more as a consolidation, rather than a loss.

Time will tell.